recovering from heart surgery

[KewlJ]

As has been mentioned I am currently recovering from heart surgery. I am going to share a little of this experience. It is sort of my way of venting, sharing, maybe feeling a little sorry for myself and just passing time all rolled into one.

I will start at the beginning. You wake up after surgery, confused, not knowing where you are. Your arms are strapped to your side like you are a mental patient or convict. Your chest hurts. Tubes coming from your chest. A tube in your nose connected to the machine that is breathing for you so you can’t speak. Tubes in both arms putting fluids and medicines into your body and a tube up your penis taking fluid out. At that moment someone, alerted that you are awake, runs into the room, leans over you and asks “how are you feeling?” Are you freaking kidding me! At that moment you realize why your arms are strapped down….so you can’t strangle this person.

It has been 17 days since that day for me now. I am home recovering. I have 3 wonderful family members, my partner and brother, both who I reside with and my mother who lives a mile away but is staying at my home while I recover. My mother is doing all the cooking, lots of protein and healthy, nutritious, foods. Nothing better than recovering to Mom’s cooking. My younger brother, is my best friend. He is serving as my cardiac rehab coach, trying to stick with the physical rehab plan given by the hospital. Trying to stick to it to the letter. And my partner, always there for me. I am not quite sure why he takes my blood pressure every 2 hours. Probably something he read or maybe the hospital suggested it for the first few days. Maybe some connection between the new heart valve working correctly and blood pressure that I am not aware of.

So, 2 and a half weeks into recovery, things are going well (I guess). My incision has healed or almost healed completely. Had a two week post op check up a couple days ago and the new heart valve is working well and everything on the inside (heart and valve) is healing well. But what heals much slower is the sternum. For anyone who doesn’t know, your sternum is broken open during open heart surgery and that takes a long time to heal and stop hurting. 12 weeks for full healing, but 6-8, before that pain begins to cease. So I have at least another 3 weeks of “discomfort”.

Discomfort doesn’t begin to describe the feeling, but I will use it. Each time you move, jossle a bit that sternum hurts. Heart patients are given a heart pillow to hold against your chest for support to minimize that jossling while you walk and move about. For the first few weeks that Heart pillow is your best friend in the world. I am using the same heart pillow from my first valve replacement 6 years ago with a lucky shamrock embroidered on it. (lucky? ) I guess I didn’t mention, I have been through this whole ordeal before, 6 short years ago. I am in my mid 30’s and this is my second go round with open heart surgery. In my case one of two mechanical valves that were replaced 6 years ago began to fail very early. These things are supposed to last 25-30 years, sometimes longer. I got 6! On the single most important issue of my life, I came up on the shit end of variance. (did I mention I am feeling just a little sorry for myself)

So 17 days out, my life is doing light exercise and takin short walks under the guidance of my brother six times a day. And in between, I eat and sleep. I can’t sleep at night in my bed. The lying prone is uncomfortable on my chest and laying on my back is not my nature sleeping position. So the only sleep I get is in my recliner dosing off and on most of the day between exercise and eating. Some life.

The past few nights I have actually opted for sleeping in the recliner rather than going up to bed. And my brother has slept on the living room sofa right next to me. I try to tell him he doesn’t have to babysit me, and should go on up to bed, but I can’t convince him. He says "pretend it’s the sleepouts in the back yard we never did as kids." He is a great brother...except when he is pushing me like a drill sergeant.

Now as the actual pain has begun to subside just a wee bit into “discomfort”, one of my biggest issues is that I am still very weak. I need help climbing stairs and sometimes when I have walked a bit too far, like a couple hundred yards, I feel weak and need a little help getting back to the car. We like to walk in a nearby park, so that I am not always parading around the sidewalks in front of my neighbors clutching my heart pillow creating a show.

And related to being weak is I have no energy. Remember Donald Trump calling jeb Bush “low energy”...well that is me, right now. Having been through this ordeal before, I know your energy level is the last thing to return, after your sternum really heals. I don’t know if there is a connection to that….maybe just at that point you can get some meaningful rest.

So, that’s about it and it is time to go for a walk. Sorry for venting. As for feeling sorry for myself, I really have no reason to. I have loving family members who love me and have put their lives on hold to care for me while I recover and that makes me the luckiest guy I know.

 

[johndoe]

Eesh, sounds horrible but at least you're on the mend, and are being well cared for. Good luck.

 

[Meistro]

That sounds like quite the ordeal; I wish you a speedy recovery.

 

[BoSox]

Wishing you the best, and a quick recovery KewlJ.

 

[psyduck]

That was a lot to go through! Take it easy and you will be all right!

 

[Splittingten's]

Wow, stories like this make me realize how little money actually means in relation to the things you can't control like (to an extent) like your health and age.
I hope you make a full recovery.

 

[KewlJ]

Wow, stories like this make me realize how little money actually means in relation to the things you can't control like (to an extent) like your health and age.

In this case, I didn't have much time between when I found out I was going for surgery, a Saturday morning and when I had surgery, a Monday morning. But in both those couple days before and the days since, you have time to think and discover some things. You realize that there are things, that you thought were important that just aren't important at all. Mostly stupid things. Family member and friends that maybe you have had a falling out with over something that really just isn't that important. Feuds, fights or bad feeling with people on the internet as well. These things are really insignificant and meaningless. And usually no one person or side is to blame. There is more than enough blame to spread around. And ego's are usually a big part of the mix. Ego's always cloud the picture.

In my own case, 6 years ago when I went through my first heart surgery, my mother and brother were not part of my life. I was estranged from my mother for 12 years from the time I was 18 and my brother who was just a kid at the time, just was caught up in the middle of that. Now 6 years later both are right here going through this with me. This is one that I got right.

Self discovery is teaching me to move forward. Don't dwell on the past, things that are really insignificant or things you can not control.

There is a saying, I am sure by someone famous or notable....You can't see where you are heading if you are always looking in the rear view mirror.

 

[ZeeBabar]

I never heard of someone in their 20's or 30's having this kind of surgery. I was once playing cricket in Fresno, back in the 80's when a guy, 51, keeled over and died of a heart failure. Turns out he had 5 other siblings who died similarly before they were 50.

Cause?

 

[KewlJ]

I never heard of someone in their 20's or 30's having this kind of surgery.

Most people haven't, but heart surgery at a younger age is not as rare as you might think. When people hear "open heart surgery" they always think of older people, probably on the western diet that have spent a lifetime eating unhealthy foods, that clogged their arteries. That's not my case.

There are also heart disease and heart valve issues that are hereditary that can lead to younger people having open heart surgery. That also is not my situation.

My original heart valve problem was the result of an infection, endocarditis. This infection spreads (I think through the blood) to the lining of the heart valve and if not treated quickly can destroy the lining of heart valves. Under normal circumstances, if treated reasonably early and not too severe, an extended antibiotic treatment will clear up this infection with minimal damage.

Mine (6 years ago) was pretty severe and not diagnosed, nor treated quickly. Unfortunately, with endocarditis, there is no severe symptoms that would lead someone to seek immediate medical attention. You feel run down and tired, maybe like you caught a bug or the flu is coming on. So most people don't seek immediate medical care and that works against them. After a while of not improving or getting worse, when people do seek medical care, it is sometimes too late, for the simple antibiotic cure, too much damage has been done to the heart valve(s).

Six years ago, when I was diagnosed and told I needed emergency surgery, I remember having the same reaction that you just expressed...that healthy people in their 20's don't have open heart surgery. The doctor told me that with endocarditis, which has damaged the heart valves to the point that surgery is needed, about 50% of patients are under the age of 35. It is an infection that doesn't discriminate by age.

My having a second heart surgery is NOT a result of a second bout with endocarditis. It's just really bad luck with a medical devise that didn't last as long as it should have. I always knew that I would likely need another replacement, because my first one occurred in my 20's. It just shouldn't have happened this soon. And now as I work through this recovery, I again am blessed with the knowledge that I will likely need yet another surgical replacement some time in my life, but hopefully 30+ years down the road. Please, please let it be 30 years down the road. And maybe, there will be advancements that make it less an ordeal than I am going through now.

 

[Splittingten's]

Hi KewlJ, in sitting in the Excalibur Kony right now and you were on my mind. I hope you're feeling better.

 

[KewlJ]

Hi KewlJ, in sitting in the Excalibur Kony right now and you were on my mind. I hope you're feeling better.

Thank you splittingtens. Today was not a great day for me. The past two days before today were better. I just have no energy and short little walks just tire me out like I am 90 year old. I hate this. But overall, I think I am very slowly heading in the right direction. It's just going to take a few more weeks or month.

 

[Splittingten's]

I wonder why today was so bad in relation to the past two. I hope you feel better tomorrow. Try to get a good nights sleep.

 

[KewlJ]

I wonder why today was so bad in relation to the past two. I hope you feel better tomorrow. Try to get a good nights sleep.

I don't know why some days are better than others. And oh what I would give for a good nights sleep. There just is no such thing right now as a good night's sleep. I can not sleep laying flat on my bed. Just too much pressure on my sternum causing discomfort. I will probably start out trying to sleep in my bed tonight because I am already upstairs, for a shower. But I won't be able to sleep. So I will move down stairs to my recliner. That is the only place I can get a little rest. Slightly reclined, holding tightly to my heart pillow for support for my chest. That is my one spot.

But that doesn't last long. Maybe an hour, 90 minutes, maybe 2 hours if I am really lucky and exhausted. But then your back or your backside starts to hurt because that is just not the natural sleep position, so you get up and move about. See what's happening online, try to find something on Tv at 3 or 4am. I try not to wake my brother who will not let me sleep downstairs alone, so he is on the sofa trying to sleep. I hear him snoring lightly and am so jealous.

Then maybe another hour of rest or light sleep and I hear my mother stirring. She is an early riser and I hear her take her shower and stuff. I'll sit on the back porch with Mom for an hour while she has her coffee and the sun rises. The good thing is at that point is I know breakfast isn't too far away.

My doctor says all heart patients go through this. No one can get any good sleep. It is just little pockets of rest throughout the day and night until your breastbone really begins to heal, which is 6 weeks minimum. The problem is with lack of decent rest, you don't have the strength or energy to do the physical program recommended to help speed recovery. It's a vicious cycle.

 

[Splittingten's]

That's rough man. Living on 1-2 hours of sleep is bad enough but to have constant discomfort couppled with it is a while new level of bad. In getting 1 to 2 hours of sleep right now myself. Right now I'm thinking of taking a nice long nap in the swimming pool area and not being harassed by security guards. Just take off my shirt, roll my pants up and enjoy the sun
Have you managed to get any blackjack in every since your surgery or do you plan on going the tables any time soon? The casino enviorment might not be the best for you right now though.

 

[KewlJ]

Update: heading into day 24 after surgery. That's 3 and a half weeks. This week has been better than last. Less pain and discomfort. Still a good deal of pain/discomfort when I walk or move about, but I am able to able to find comfortable, mostly pain free periods while resting in my recliner and even sleeping in bed. That is a big improvement and some quality rest really helps. And it means my brother has been able to sleep in his bed, in his room, instead of "babysitting" me in the living room at night.

But what hasn't improved at all is my strength, stamina and energy levels. I am still very weak. My light exercise and walks 4-6 times a day really wear me out. Sometimes I feel like I can't support myself and need help at the end. This is humbling and frustrating. Tonight (wed), my partner, mother, brother and I went to a local casino to the buffet for dinner to give my mother who has been doing all the cooking a break. As I got my food at the buffet, I became very weak and felt unsteady. My mother was nearby and grabbed my arm and helped me back to the table. Holding my "heart pillow" against my sternum for support with my mother helping me, I felt completely humiliated as people looked at me like I was a freak show.

I hate this. I hate depending on people and I hate people looking at me like I am a freak. I can't wait to begin to grow stronger and get my energy back and get back to some sense of normalcy. Hopefully a few more weeks.

 

[21forme]

Patience, grasshopper. Have you seen or talk to the doc recently? If not, call the office and pass along the above post. Find out if that's normal at this stage. Get some reassurance or go in to be checked out, if not.

 

[KewlJ]

Patience, grasshopper. Have you seen or talk to the doc recently? If not, call the office and pass along the above post. Find out if that's normal at this stage. Get some reassurance or go in to be checked out, if not.

Yes, I had a two week check up last week and have a month check up next week. There really is no 'normal' as everyone responds and recovers differently. But my recovery so far is well within the bounds of 'normal'. It takes 6-8 weeks for the sternum, which is broken apart to get to the heart, to heal. That is really the worse part.

And having the "benefit" (<- I guess ) of having gone through this before, I know that it also takes 6-8 weeks before your strength and energy comes back and you really begin to feel like yourself again. Those two things must be related, although I don't know how. But knowing that doesn't make it any easier. I still hate needing people's help and hate people looking at me like I am a freak.

I guess patience isn't one of my strong suits. As a matter of fact, I am not even sure what my strong suit is. Guess I wouldn't make a very good bridge or pinochle player if I can't figure out my strong suit.

 

[KewlJ]

Final update:

Monday, 11/20, 5 weeks since surgery. I am finally really starting to feel better. Marked improvement over the last week or so. Pain is almost completely gone now. Just the slightest bit of discomfort or soreness when I move about walking and climbing stairs. I am still not back to my regular self as far as strength and energy levels, but I am growing stonger every day now. It won't be long before I am back to 100% percent.

I have retired my heart pillow, which has now seen me through the worst times of two heart surgeries. Those that have not experienced heart surgery, might not understand the "heart pillow". First and foremost it serves a function, holding it against your chest in the weeks after surgery to help stabilize your broken sternum as you move about, reducing pain and discomfort. But for most of us, it is much more than that, as there is an emotional attachment. I suppose similar to a child and his teddy bear, your heart pillow is your best friend during those worst of times.

My mother who moved in to my home 5 weeks ago, and has been acting as my chef during recovery, returned to her home nearby yesterday. She only lives a mile away, so I suspect I will still see her daily for a while. I am grateful to her for her help and will miss being spoiled by Mom's cooking.

My brother, who is also my blackjack partner, returned to work last week after more than 4 weeks of taking time off to serve as my cardiac therapy coach during my recovery. I love that "kid". He is my best friend.

My partner and I will return to his work today, of playing all our machine play, free play and playing required amounts to generate future free play. And we will return to our daily meals courtesy of the casinos. It's going to seem like a step down from Mom's cooking. And hopefully sometime in the next couple weeks, I will ease back into a little blackjack play.

I thank you all for allowing me this space to do a little venting and feel a little sorry for myself over the last 5 weeks. It was really helpful to me to have a place to do so. Thanks again, and happy Thanksgiving to everyone.

 

[John John]

Congratulations, i'm glad to hear things are looking up for you!
Happy thanks giving.

 

[Ryemo]

Glad to hear you’re doing better, KJ.