This
"I don't think I am losing" quote is kind of bizarre. A professional or even a non-professional but serious player, ought to damn right
KNOW whether he is winning or losing over any period of time. Anyone not keeping records to know this is not playing seriously. Even Zee and his bizarre "shoebox" accounting from his early years knew if he was winning or losing.
Another quote from that same post:
"I am think I am about even..." This one reminds me of my grandfather, a life long horse racing guy (like 5 times a week type guy). When I would ask him how he had done over his life, he always said
"I am about even". He wasn't! And he was not alone. A lot of gamblers, of all sort, playing -EV games, if you ask them how they have done over any period of time, the answer is always
"about even".